Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Randomize
