Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Randomize
