I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
