is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
