the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize