Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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