For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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