New invention idea: vibrating tampons
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
