remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
You were trust falling into bushes
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize