I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
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