Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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