i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
