i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
