Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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