At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
