The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
