Need sex. Gaining weight.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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