New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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