It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I could fuck to npr.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
