I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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