what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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