2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
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