used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Randomize
