im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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