Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize