He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
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