There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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