if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Randomize
