I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
