The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
