New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
