Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
Randomize
