She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
being pregnant is like rehab
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
