He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
party gras won. party gras always wins.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
