i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize