How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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