no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
