great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
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