Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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