____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
Randomize
