I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
