He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
