Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
