guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
My brother slept till 4, bought a sword, got drunk and sharpened said sword. I went to corporate compliance training. Life is not fair.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
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