still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
