What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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