I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
