I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
i think my cat just said my name.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Randomize
