I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
