I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize