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• (586): View more from Michigan

  There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".

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• (917): View more from New York City

  I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help

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• (512): View more from Texas

  The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night

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• (239): View more from Florida

  You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.

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• (585): View more from New York

  If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live

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• (805): View more from California

  I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"

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• (928): View more from Arizona

  Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!

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